France is officially at war with social media. And the battle cries are echoing all over Europe. President Emmanuel Macron say children's minds are "not for sale" and wants a social media ban for under-15s by September.
According to France's health watchdog, half of teens spend between two and five hours a day on their smartphones.
But your reporter went for dinner with some tech lobbyists, and it is clear now this ban sounds like a nightmare. Let us investigate.
Supporters say it protects kids from harmful content. Over one-half of European teens have seen online pornography. The average age of first exposure? Just 11.
And in the era of Elon Musk’s GrokAI, they do not even need to search for it. They can generate it. Let us cheer for the AI revolution.
Australia, which was the first country to ban social media for teens, claims the ban helps kids focus. Like children actually need focus to study. Algebra is generally much easier when you are interrupted every 12 seconds.
Finally, the ban would hurt the profits of the big US and Chinese apps. But instead of naming them, here is a video of a sad puppy. Just look at his sad eyes.
Look, if your child no longer recognises your face because it is not vertical, do not worry. Simply send them a funny cat video. But with the social media ban, you cannot. Case closed.
Now, let us go back to doomscrolling.
Watch the video in the player above for the entire story.